Wednesday, July 4, 2007
1st Media Monarchy News Report
BROADCASTING LIVE DAILY AT http://www.ourmiscegenation.blogspot.com/ AT GMT 1200
1° 17′ 0″ N, 103° 51′ 0″ E: Today, July 4th 2007, is a day that will be remembered by many, not because Americans are celebrating their proudest day of the year, rather a group of multi racial humans have come together and decided to speak their mind on all issues that intrigued them. While half of Americans are celebrating this auspicous day with lots of booze, fireworks, sex & with the President announcing his "love" for his country, we on the other side of the world have decided to commemerate this wonderful day with some prayers for the lives lost during the Iraqi Operation and many still dying due to diseases and who are helpless with their current life situation. Expect alot of bullshit here cause this is how we lay back and put a smile to our faces before dying for a couple of hours.
On other news, the suspected killers of both murders of Whampoa Drive and Stirling Road has been caught. Apparently Indians for both murders. Lawl! But fear not my indian friends, their demeanors would not in any way show any inferiority or inhumane of the Indian Race. Rather this shows us that a couple of bad sheeps of a race or religion doesnt reflect anything bad about the community involved.
On our news, Mr Tall-Dark-and-Hensem came late for class and had no balls to enter the class, fearing the embarrassement he has to face if he got screwed by the infamous Sir Talk-Alot-Of-Crap-Trying-Too-Hard-To-Get-The-Appreciation-And-Love-Of-His-Educatee. And because of that he missed on how to solve calculation problems which is incorporated in the upcoming assessment. Lucky for him, Sir Thick-Moustache-Soon-To-Be-A-Father was rather kind and he will conduct a class on the assessment day itself from 1-2pm (GMT+8). And yesterday's miracle of him going to his classes was shortlived today when he didnt go for his GEMS and went to campus for only 1 and a half hours. Congratulations Mr Tall-Dark-and-Hensem for your incredible feat of going to classes which lasted a day. Today, another presentation of how pussylike our Mr. HondaJazz aka Mr. SmellyLikeFuckWhenHeBurpsOrFarts is. He cant even ask Sir Thick-Moustache-Soon-To-Be-A-Father about his dispute with Sir Talk-Alot-Of-Crap-Trying-Too-Hard-To-Get-The-Appreciation-And-Love-Of-His-Educatee. Mr LaughLikeShit aka Mr35yrOldIndian had to ask Sir Thick-Moustache-Soon-To-Be-A-Father for Mr. SmellyLikeFuckWhenHeBurpsOrFarts. PUSSY! PUSSY! PUSSY! My apologies, just had to do it. Apparently the TZM of Mr. Pussyliath is still in the workshop. Why u ask? CAuse apparently he jammed his brake too hard and the disks got stuck. So much for being a pro biker riding down Tuas Road at 160Km/h. Bah! Cant even brake for nuts. Today is a joyous day for Mr. PoloTeeHairyAssMUthaFucker. He learnt the art of playing Tai Tee. Still suck at it though, requiring aids from Mr LaughLikeShit and MrHeartbreaker aka MrOldFlamesNvrDie. *Cough* HA *Cough* NI *Cough* TA. Who u ask? She will be further explained in details on a future post. Mr. ApekSitDownAtCoffeeShopWithRolexAndMercedes got bastard yesterday by Mr. Pussyliath and Mr. PoloTeeHairyAssMUthaFucker. Apparently they ditched him to get a free ride by Mr35yrOldIndian. He was caught today, 1st hand, by the reporter saying," Fuck, Y didnt they juz die in the near collison yesterday?!" Tsk tsk Mr. ApekSitDownAtCoffeeShopWithRolexAndMercedes, Not very nice. Oh, fyi, they were nearly killed by a drunk swerving into their lane trying to find his exit off the highway. Boss aka Mr. HairLikeABridsNest was caught skipping his GEMS for the 1st time today. What an achievement! This partly due to all those marfarkers who skipped their GEMS. But i wasnt surprised, hes Boyan aka MALAY. Easily persuaded and influenced. Just give funds for them for studies till University and u can forget about them living in the country. Tee Hee. Miss Rasyidah was pissed of the number of times he was called a girl and decided to shave her head bald. But Fearing that his small ugly head will get taunted by the public he decided to continue his life as a girl.
Updates of the pairing off:
Mr. Heartbreaker & NewGirl (Mr35yrOldIndian says it wont last a month, lets see about that)
Mr.35yroldIndian & Miss Filipino
Mr. Tall, Dark & Hensem & Miss Mumtaz Begum (In process. Thats right always go on the rebound baby!!)
Mr. SmellyLikeFuckWhenHeBurpsOrFarts & Miss YvonneHeadKenaSquashed
Miss Rasyidah & MissMMFinalistWhoDecidedToLoseHerself&GotDAmnFat (Wat?? They are back together? Den Den denggggg....)
Boss & GirlTwoFloorsDown
Mr. PoloTeeHairyAssMUthaFucker & Miss KC aka NiceShaved......Armpits Of course.. woo i liiikkkkkkkeeeee.
Thats all i have for today. Any updates on the list inform our studio and we will get it up asap. Read smile and no more complains and lawsuits please. It very costly and our Indian lawyers are still on the way from the mainland so please dont sue us yet. Maybe in a couple of months when their ship has set sail in our port. But dont expect fast answers from them coz, ehem ehem, indians arent well known for their punctuality.. Lawl!
Jaghemash, Thank you, Xie Xie, Terima Kasih, Nandri.
Reported By: Our Most Renowned Reporter Mr. Lee Muhammad Kuppusuamy John Anagandhi s/o Karuppia Megamohan
-The people i SavedKIlled